I was never able to express myself
Not in a genuine,
Soul-searched,
Wide-open way,
Not to you,
Anyhow,
The one person who mattered more to me
Than life itself,
One day that I remember clear…
And all this time later,
All these years hence and beyond and gone,
I still remember that day,
I still hold on to that day,
It still haunts and affects and moves me
Because I was never your boy,
Not that boy,
Not the one you wrote home about
Or cried about,
Or didn’t want to live without,
I was just someone else
Not really to be bothered about…
O God I remember it
How possibly could I have forgotten it?
I couldn’t
I can’t
It’s still here,
It’s me,
Hiding behind my computer screen.
